Success for Men – Being an Adult Is for Pussies

6

Red is actually the man, but his image will work for this post.

After our workout last night I had a great conversation with my rock star client (seriously, she really is a rock star, with a grad degree in Chemistry… talk about awesome) about life, growing up, doing things, and moving on. It really brought some stuff to the forefront of my mind that I’ve been chewing on for a while and so here we go:

We were talking about what a pain in the ass it is to schedule stuff, especially social obligations, into our calender. For example, we both have to schedule time to hang out with our friends and family in addition to satisfying the other draws on our time. She has to schedule the social stuff around shows, rehearsal, the gym, teaching, and so on. I schedule hang-out time around training, programming, writing, my own training, and on and on. For real, I have “Tuesday, 7:00pm to 10:00, beers with XXXXX” written into my planner. We’re not the type of people that you can just call and say “Let’s go hang out at the pub”. It just doesn’t work like that.

And I’m damn happy that it doesn’t.

The reason I’m happy that we’re booked up is because that means that we’re hustling. We’re out there getting better and pushing ourselves. We’re grown and have grown-up responsibilities, but that doesn’t mean that we’re “adults”.

Let’s think about typical “adults” for a second. You know, that thing that happens sometime after you graduate from college and/or hit your middle 20’s? You hit that late 20’s to early 30’s mark and here it is: You’re an adult. You’ve got a job that your parents are willing to talk about to their friends. You make decent money. You work regular hours. You come home after work to the “starter home” you’ve bought (trust me, I’ve been there), do some yard work (still do that, too), and then you eat some dinner, grab a cold one, and sit your ass on the couch in front of the computer or TV. Maybe one of your buddies calls you up to go shoot some pool or watch the game, or maybe they don’t, it doesn’t really matter; You’re available.

If you’ve got a girl then she probably has at least one more chore for you to do (two if it’s Wednesdays, Hay-OH!), then it’s time to eat and rack up some more TV time before bed and doing it all over again.

The weekend? Man, the adults live for that shit! They start off by going to Home Depot, wandering around for an hour with their mouths gaping open seeking to buy a drill bit and some weather stripping. Then they get to fix some stuff around the house (usually breaking something that they’ll need to fix next weekend), watch MORE TV, maybe catch a game, and so on. Come Sunday they’ll bitch because the weekend is over and they have to go back to work on Monday.

All of this continues until you eventually retire… Where you can have full-time weekends! Way to be a hero, dude.

Talk about taking the safe way out of life! Low risk paves the way, right, bro?

Safe is for pussies.


Now, on the other hand, what do kids do? Kids are always learning and trying new things. Kids experiment. Kids are always busy doing something (including getting into trouble if they’re not headed in the right direction). Kids mess up. Kids also have resounding successes. All in all, it’s pretty exciting being a kid.

Get my drift?

I’m not telling you to burn up your 401(k). I’m not telling you to not buy a house if it’s wise for you to do so. I’m not telling you that you don’t want to get a good job (unless you’re like me and basically un-hireable by people dumber than you). I’m not saying that it is not your RESPONSIBILITY to take care of yourself, your spouse, and your kids. That’s called being a MAN.

What I am telling you is that the other part of being a man is always questing for improvement. Always pushing yourself to be better as a man and as a person. When your friends call you shouldn’t be easy to find every evening sitting in front of the TV watching SportsCenter or some dumbass sitcom or reality show. Instead you should be saying “Sorry, man, I go to Portuguese lessons on Tuesdays” (after all, you ARE going to Brazil for Carnival this coming year, right?) or “I can’t, bro, I go to Muay Thai on Thursdays”. Whatever it is you do, make it something where you’re investing your time and generating a return of skill, social networking, and pleasure.

You’re too good to be wasting your life as an “adult”. Be a man instead.






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Pings on Success for Men – Being an Adult Is for Pussies

January 29, 2011

Comments on Success for Men – Being an Adult Is for Pussies Leave a Comment

January 31, 2011

Greg @ 7:12 pm #

Sense of humor serves as all-spice of the day. It goes a long way from sunrise until I fall asleep at night.

February 1, 2011

Isaac @ 12:51 pm #

Greg,

Thanks for stopping by, man! Yeah, a sense of humor is key to dealing with life’s ups AND downs. If you can’t find some humor in most situations then you’re not trying hard enough.

Eliza @ 2:01 pm #

I could not live my life without having a reason to back near everything I do. I feel blessed that I have a lot of friends and family that understand this, and usually are either out hustling themselves or cheering me on in my efforts.

What used to frustrate me (and still does occasionally to this day), are the unlikely demotivational candidates that say “Dude, just relax” at every other thing. Well, dude, I understand the importance of relaxing, and I make sure to add in a little of it each day. But the activity I’ve chosen to do right now with the exact intensity I’m doing is going to better my future. I reap equal if not more enjoyment out of working, because I know how to squeeze in find into my everyday tasks. I chose things that I enjoy, and I work for a future based in those things. I work, and I work hard just because I want that future that much.

So thanks for this reminder post, Isaac. You’re A-class, man.

Isaac @ 4:58 pm #

Eliza,

You’ve hit it right on the head there and I think that it’s what a lot of people are missing (this could and probably will become a blog post):

You need to find what you’re passionate about and turn it into your living.

The goal should not be to not work. Instead the goal should be to find something that you WANT to spend your hours doing. I mean, everyone has the day where they don’t want to go to work, but in general you should jump out of bed every morning looking forward to what you get to do that day. If you don’t, then maybe you should be looking into the choices you’re making in your life.

Now someone is going to chime in and say: “Yeah, but the world needs ditch diggers, sewer repair guys, etc, and nobody loves those jobs”. Probably true. But the difference is that there’s lots of people who aren’t ambitious enough to craft their lives. They end up doing those jobs. For those who want more out of life (the readers of this blog), then there’s passion to be had.

I’m A-class because I surround myself with A-class people.

Isaac

Eliza @ 2:02 pm #

Dang typos early in the morning. Squeeze in fun into my everyday tasks*

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